Anxiety disconnects us from ourselves. We forget who we really are and become stuck in the mind prison of fear. Attempts to rationalize our experience through logic and reason are unlikely to bring relief. However, psychotherapy - whether in-person or in the form of online therapy, is an excellent remedy for anxiety. Psychotherapy modalities that address the deeper layers of our psyche, such as hypnotherapy and Neurolinguistics (NLP), have proven to be effective in releasing the unresolved negative emotions, including fear, that underlie the experience of anxiety, and restoring our sense of inner peace, balance and wellbeing.
Anxiety seems to be even more prevalent among gay men and the LGBTQI+ community. Growing up in a world that, for the most part, still deems LGBTQI+ folks as inappropriate, shameful, damaged, etc., many of us had to keep a big secret. Growing up gay, we feared rejection, abandonment, and retaliation by our friends and family if they found out the nature of our attraction and desire. The fear of losing the love and support of our family and friends was a palpable presence during the formative years of many gay men in our community. If this is not anxiety-provoking, I don’t know what is.
Regardless of our sexual orientation, many of us still catch ourselves jumping on the familiar anxiety train, feeling restless and uneasy. The experience of anxiety has an uncanny ability to take us out of the moment and into our head-space, in which we tend to conjure and replay the worst-case scenarios about anything and everything. The most enjoyable moments become void of pleasure and we are MIA to our family and loved ones.
What causes anxiety?
To fully understand anxiety, we have to consider all aspects of our human experience. The human experience can be viewed through the prism of the 4 aspects of our being: Spiritual, Mental, Emotional, and Physical. When we think about the causes of anxiety, we can consider what each plane is contributing to that experience.
The Spiritual plane is the plane of infinite potentialities, the essential reality, the great creative source out of which all other realities and planes emerge into being. It is the plane of our blueprint, of our Higher Self, and of the very core of “Who we truly are,” including our Highest Purpose and our Path. When our thoughts, emotions, and actions are in alignment with our Higher Purpose, we are well. However, when we forget our true nature and deviate from our Path, our inner being will urge us to realign and get back on track. This often creates an experience of inner disharmony, which indicates that we are not being true to ourselves. If not attended to, this inner discord may grow into an emotional experience of anxiety.
The Mental plane is the plane of our thoughts, beliefs, attention, and focus. Our culture, our family, and life experiences, including our past traumas, have shaped the way we tend to think about ourselves, others, and the world. Our Higher Self holds the knowledge of our incredible creative power and the understanding of Universal Principles. When we disconnect from our inner knowing and buy into the cultural ideas about the world being a dangerous place, and about us having no control over our life experience, we open the door for anxiety to set in. Catastrophic “what if” scenarios take advantage of our disempowering beliefs and we find ourselves either attempting to over-exert control or withdraw into fear. We never lose our creative power – we just temporarily forget we had it all along.
The Emotional plane is, of course, the plane of our feelings. It mirrors our Mental plane and fills our thoughts with corresponding and matching emotional content. For example, future-focused thoughts of doom and gloom will elicit an experience of anxiety and worry in the present. Additionally, our emotional “baggage” is also stored here. All our past unresolved negative emotions and past traumas live within this plane and contribute to the development of anxiety.
Finally, the Physical plane includes everything around us that can be experienced through our five senses, as well as our physical body. The physical plane is a manifestation of 3 higher non-physical planes (Spiritual, Mental, and Emotional) into the tangible 3D reality. Attending to the non-physical aspects of our being through psychotherapy, counseling, personal growth, and spiritual practices will ultimately reflect on the Physical plane and physiological balance will be restored.
How can we alleviate anxiety?
In order to alleviate anxiety, all 4 planes of experience must be addressed. Psychotherapy and counseling are the tools to address the non-physical aspects of our being and restore wellness.
When we are working together to restore your well-being, we will be applying the 3-step ARC psychotherapy system to create rapid and profound transformation within the Mental, Emotional, and Physical plains of your experience.
Following is the 3 power-step A-R-C therapy approach to alleviate the experience of anxiety and establish wellness:
Awareness – During the first Power-Step of psychotherapy we will evaluate all aspects of your life that brought you to where you are now. Here we aim to gain insight into the current situation and determine the root cause(s) of current challenges. It is during this step that we also clearly define the ultimate goals for our work together, as well as the evidence procedure, which will show us that our work has been a total success. The Awareness Power-Step is a crucial step that identifies both the problem and the solution.
Release – In the second Power-Step of our therapy we will use advanced mind-technology, such as Neuro-Linguistic-Programming (NLP) and elements of hypnotherapy, to help you release the old emotional baggage of unresolved negative emotions and limiting beliefs, and clear your path toward your desires and dreams. Using NLP and elements of hypnotherapy we will let go of unresolved anger, sadness, fear, guilt, shame, and hurt. We will also release past limiting decisions and old beliefs that no longer serve you and prevent you from living the life that you intend for yourself.
Co-Creation – The third and final Power-Step of psychotherapy is designed to provide new tools and resources to solidify your gains and establish your life trajectory toward your dreams. During this step, we create a sound and clear vision of your ideal life and set you on the path of joy, purpose, and fulfillment.
As a psychotherapist, I see my role as that of a guide. My role is to lead my clients toward inner balance and well-being. I can help you find your path and support you in achieving all your heart desires. However, there is one condition to consider: as I am guiding you, you will have to do the walking.
Is psychotherapy for me?
My clinic proudly serves the diverse and multifaceted communities of Los Angeles California at large. Sometimes I am asked whether as a therapist I can guarantee results. This is an important question to answer. Our time, energy, and money are important resources and we want to allocate them wisely. When we talk about guarantees, there are two key elements to consider – you and me. As a therapist, I can absolutely guarantee that my clients receive absolutely all of my knowledge, expertise, experience, attention, and support. I can also guarantee that if my total commitment to your success is met with the same commitment from you, our work will have a transformative impact on your life.
My 100% success guarantee comes with 3 necessary attitudes on the part of my clients:
1. Ownership of full responsibility for our life. Knowingly or unknowingly, intentionally or unintentionally, we are 100% responsible and our life, including our relationship, is our making.
2. Willingness to let go of old baggage, including resentments, anger, grief, old beliefs etc.
3. Full commitment to making all changes necessary to achieve our goals.
This single-minded commitment to your success and well-being is the key component of our work. From my clinical experience at my Los Angeles psychotherapy clinic, I can attest that 100% of my clients who showed up with 100% commitment to themselves, achieved remarkable life-changing results during our work together.
Perhaps, despite the pain you are experiencing in your relationship, you are struggling to fully commit to couples counseling. If this is the case, you are not alone. Sometimes we need a little nudge to help us bring our intent and motivation into a single-minded laser-sharp focus. Consider how a trusting loving intimate connection with your partner could change your life. What it would feel like to wake up in the morning to a warm loving embrace? How would it feel to come home to a warm welcome from your spouse? What would a connected time together be like? How rekindled intimacy would contribute to your well-being, your career, and your health? If these thoughts create curiosity or even excitement within you, pick up the phone and give me a call. Transformation, empowerment, and growth are just a phone call away.